Author: nicolepmiles

“Wherefore I also, after I heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus, and love unto all the saints, Cease not to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers” (Ephesians 1:15-16)

I love November. Halloween is big in our house and after the rush and stress and lack of sleep from creating the perfect costumes (I tend to go overboard… I don’t want to talk about it…), November feels like a time to reset and refocus. It gets colder and the cozy blankets and sweats come out. It is the calm between Halloween and the hustle and bustle of Christmas. The whole world is focused, just for a brief moment, on gratitude. It gives me a few weeks to refocus and prepare for the greatest season of all when we celebrate the birth of our Savior.
Today I am focusing my gratitude practice on people. I love this scripture because Paul takes time in the opening of his letter to express how grateful he is for the people. He wants them to know that he is thanking God for them and the good they are doing, and they are strangers to him. But he prays for them and is so grateful for them.

How often do we forget to be grateful for the people in our lives. Our children (even when they drive us nuts), our extended families, our friends, of course. But what about the person who lets us change lanes in front of them on the freeway, or the checker at our local grocery store who always has a sticker for the 2 year old. The smiling face at the front desk at the school. The teacher who takes a few minutes extra time out of her day to help our struggling child. The karate teacher who teaches with love. The girl at the drive through who makes the perfect dirty diet coke.

President Monson said, “A grateful heart, then, comes through expressing gratitude to our Heavenly Father for His blessings and to those around us for all that they bring into our lives. This requires conscious effort—at least until we have truly learned and cultivated an attitude of gratitude. Often we feel grateful and intend to express our thanks but forget to do so or just don’t get around to it.” (“The Divine Gift of Gratitude,” General Conference, October 2010).

I challenge you today to “get around to it,” Make a list – aloud or on paper – of all the people you think of or encounter today that you are grateful for. And then share that gratitude with as many as you can. Tell your family, tell your friends and thank your God for the wonderful people you are surrounded by. I can promise you it will brighten your outlook on life and the world we live in.

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: Who are you grateful for today?

Call to Action: Participate with me in a focused, intentional, gratitude practice every day for the next 2 weeks. Please share with us in the comments here or on instagram!

“Certainly our world has always been, and will continue to be, imperfect. Far too many innocent people suffer because of circumstances of nature as well as from man’s inhumanity. The corruption and wickedness in our day are unique and alarming.

But in spite of all this, I wouldn’t trade living in this time with any other time in the history of the world. We are blessed beyond measure to live in a day of unparalleled prosperity, enlightenment, and advantage. Most of all, we are blessed to have the fulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ, which gives us a unique perspective on the world’s dangers and shows us how to either avoid these dangers or deal with them.

When I think of these blessings, I want to fall to my knees and offer praises to our Heavenly Father for His never-ending love for all of His children.

I don’t believe God wants His children to be fearful or dwell on the evils of the world. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”

He has given us an abundance of reasons to rejoice. We just need to find and to recognize them. The Lord often reminds us to “be not afraid,” to “be of good cheer,” and to “fear not, little flock.” (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “Perfect Love Casteth Out Fear,” General Conference, April 2017)

Once again I find myself contemplating the craziness of the world we live in today. In just the last week there has been so much fear. So much violence. A random act that lead to a large portion of the city on lockdown for fear of a spree, then yet another mass shooting in a community. It seems like such a common occurrence that it has become the new normal. It is hard not to be fearful every time I drop my kids off at school, go to a mall or hospital, or walk through an unfamiliar part of town. It is exhausting and completely useless to be afraid. It doesn’t help me or anyone else, but it is hard not to fear when we are inundated with stories of violence and evil.

My sons are often fearful—sometimes completely irrationally so. Tonight my son told us to stop saying the word “Mercedes” because it was creeping him out and he didn’t want to have nightmares. I’m not sure what is scary about a Mercedes… I had one in high school and sure, it was slow and old and loud, but it wasn’t scary! But when my kids are having a hard time I always tell them, “fear does not come from Heavenly Father. It comes from Satan. He wants us to be afraid because you can’t be afraid and feel the spirit at the same time. So if you don’t want to be afraid, do something that brings the spirit. Pray, sing a song, read some scriptures and think about Jesus.”

Those simple instructions to my boys are still true for us. Fear does not come from God. Satan wants us afraid and to feel like we are alone. We are not. God is with us. Right now I find the best way to combat the fear of this big, scary world we live in is with gratitude. I start listing, out loud if necessary, all the things I am grateful for: My family, the trees growing in my yard, baseball coaches, teachers, grass, heavy whipping cream, new running shoes, kisses from my 2 year old, the sun shining through my kitchen window, my pillow. I list as many things as I can think of—big or small. And it helps. Gratitude and Love. They are what chase away fear and combat the darkness.

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: What are you afraid of? How can you chase out the fear and invite the Spirit into your heart?

Call to Action: Being that it is November, it seems fitting to start a gratitude challenge. For the next 2 weeks until Thanksgiving, instigate a daily gratitude practice. There are many ways to do a gratitude practice. I like to do mine out loud while I am walking outside (yeah, I probably look a little crazy, but that’s ok). A gratitude journal to write in daily works great. A daily prayer of just gratitude is another option. Find a gratitude practice that works for you and incorporate it into your meditation time for the next 2 weeks. Lets chase away the fear and hate in the world by flooding our lives with gratitude!

“Behold, he was spoken of by Moses; yea, and behold a type was raised up in the wilderness, that whosoever would look upon it might live. And many did look and live.
But few understood the meaning of those things, and this because of the hardness of their hearts. But there were many who were so hardened that they would not look, therefore they perished. Now the reason they would not look is because they did not believe that it would heal them.” (Alma 33:19-20)

When the snakes came raining down and the people of Moses were being bitten, God provided a simple way out. All they had to do was look at the staff and they would live. The bright shining staff that was mere inches away was the solution to all their problems. The answer was so simple and it seemed unbelievable. It defied their human logic so they looked around for some other solution that made more sense to them and as a result, many died.

So often when we are searching or struggling through life we turn to the wrong sources looking for the answers. We look for “reasonable” solutions to the problems we face believing that such big problems cannot be solved by something we can’t see. We tell ourselves we have faith in Christ, but when it comes down to it, we refuse to just look at the staff. If we will just turn to him, he will give us the solutions. We don’t have to make it so hard on ourselves. We just need to trust him and believe that he CAN do what he says he will do for us, even when it seems illogical or miraculous. Because it is. The Atonement IS miraculous. It is the greatest miracle there is. But it is also real. It happened. And it is there for us every day if we will just look.

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: Where are you looking for your answers?

“The Church in its divine mission and we in our personal lives seem to face increasing opposition today. Perhaps as the Church grows in strength and we members grow in faith and obedience, Satan increases the strength of his opposition so we will continue to have “opposition in all things.”

“Some of this opposition even comes from Church members. Some who use personal reasoning or wisdom to resist prophetic direction give themselves a label borrowed from elected bodies—“the loyal opposition.” However appropriate for a democracy, there is no warrant for this concept in the government of God’s kingdom, where questions are honored but opposition is not (see Matthew 26:24).

“As another example, there are many things in our early Church history, such as what Joseph Smith did or did not do in every circumstance, that some use as a basis for opposition. To all I say, exercise faith and put reliance on the Savior’s teaching that we should “know them by their fruits” (Matthew 7:16). The Church is making great efforts to be transparent with the records we have, but after all we can publish, our members are sometimes left with basic questions that cannot be resolved by study. That is the Church history version of “opposition in all things.” Some things can be learned only by faith (see D&C 88:118). Our ultimate reliance must be on faith in the witness we have received from the Holy Ghost.” (Dallin H. Oaks, “Opposition In All Things,” General Conference, April 2016)

This passage from Elder Oaks fits well with our study and focus of the past week on staying strong and relying on our faith when those around us are waivering. The opposition feels palpable right now. Instead of just coming at us from outside the church, it is coming from within our own ranks. I think that kind of opposition can be even harder to fight because we feel like we should be able to rely on our fellow members to strengthen us, rather than drag us down. I am reminded of conversations I had as a college student at BYU-Hawaii. Members of the church from outside of Utah would call my testimony and faith levels into question saying that I had not been challenged much because I was from Utah and everyone around me was LDS while they had had to fight for their values and faith on a regular basis as one of only a few members in their high school. I vehemently disagreed. They could rely on their religion as their excuse for not participating when offered a drink by a friend. When I was presented with a similar situation, it was more than likely by another member of the church. I had to stand up for my values among those who purported to have the same standards. In the end, opposition is opposition and we have to be able to stand on our own two feet and hold our ground whether that opposition is coming from the outside world or those sitting next to us in the pews. Our faith must be based in Christ and not rely on the strength of those around us to carry us along.

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: Where are you feeling the opposition right now?

Mindfulness Tip: Try meditating outside today. A connection to the earth and to nature can add a new dimension to your meditation practice.

“Behold, great and marvelous are the works of the Lord. How unsearchable are the depths of the mysteries of him; and it is impossible that man should find out all his ways. And no man knoweth of his ways save it be revealed unto him; wherefore, brethren, despise not the revelations of God.” (Jacob 4:8)

In this day of information overload and the transparency movement, we want to know everything and we want to know it right now. When we can’t find all the answers, we assume that there must be something intentionally being hidden from us to deceive us. We want to know all the secrets and all the mysteries so we can make “informed” decisions. When we don’t find satisfactory answers we take our doubts and run with them. I think this is what is leading many to leave the church right now.

It is GOOD to seek. It is GOOD to want more knowledge. We should be studying and learning and growing, but the veil is there for a reason. It is there for many reasons, but one of them for our protection. NOT having all the answers at our fingertips protects our agency and protects us from being held accountable for all of the knowledge. We are only accountable for what we know and understand and how we live up to that. God does not give us all of the mysteries of the universe right now and that is ok. We can seek and find and receive revelation but it will come line upon line so that we can build our knowledge as we build our faith and our capacity to handle that knowledge. We have to become more comfortable with doubt—more comfortable with unknowing, and trust in what HAS been revealed to us. We have to trust God that He knows the answers and that He will work it all out for us in the end. We can rely on the answers we have been given, the spiritual experiences we have ad and our relationship with God and trust that the rest will fall into place and will be revealed in time.

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: Why does doubt make us so uncomfortable? What is doubt? How can it serve us rather than hinder us?

“In an increasingly secular world, less emphasis is placed on the amount of spiritual growth necessary to become more Christlike and establish the foundations that lead to enduring faith. We tend to emphasize moments of sublime spiritual understanding. These are precious instances when we know the Holy Ghost has witnessed special spiritual insights to our heats and minds. We rejoice in these events; they should not be diminished in any way. But for enduring faith and to have the constant companionship of the Spirit, there is no substitute for the individual religious observance that is comparable to physical and mental development. We should build on these experiences, which sometimes resemble initial baby steps. We do this by consecrated commitment to sacred sacrament meetings, scripture study, prayer, and serving as called.” (Quentin L. Cook, “Foundations of Faith,” General Conference, April 2017)

Yesterday we talked about remembering those big moments. Reliving them can be a powerful way to remind us of the foundations of our testimony. But it is not sufficient to maintain our faith. If it were, so many formerly faithful members would not leave the church. We cannot rely on those experiences alone. We must continually build up our foundation of faith so that it has the strength to stand the test of time and flood of “information” that comes at us every day. We must turn to Christ and His teachings and rely on HIS information, not the thoughts and testimonies of those around us.

I studied hard in college. I loved my classes and I loved to learn. One of my favorite classes was a Biopsychology class. We learned about the structures and functions of the brain. I studied hard for that class and aced it. I could locate and label every part of the brain at a glance. But that was 15 years ago… today I remember very little of it. I cannot rely on my study from 15 years ago to retain the knowledge I once had. Now that I am out of practice, I can only remember a small part of it. The same goes for our spiritual knowledge. It is not a “one and done” sort of learning.

Elder Cook goes on to say, “Just as repetition and consistent effort are required to gain physical or mental capacity, the same is true in spiritual matters. Remember that the Prophet Joseph received the same visitor, Moroni, with exactly the same message four times in preparation for receiving the plates. I believe that weekly participation in sacred sacrament meetings has spiritual implications we do not fully understand. Pondering the scriptures regularly—rather that reading them occasionally—can substitute a superficial understanding for a sublime, life-changing enhancement of our faith.”

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: How are you building upon your foundation of faith?

Call to Action: I am doing a 3 day meditation challenge – 2 times a day, for 3 days, at least 10 minutes long with a focus on Christ and the foundation of my testimony. I would love for you to join me and share your experiences.

Mindfulness Tip: New to meditation? Try an app. I am using Simple Habit this week. I have also liked Headspace in the past. Both have a free learning series. Simple Habit has several so you can find one that works for you.

“And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yeah, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power of you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.” (Helaman 5:12)

With so many people I know and love leaving the church it is becoming clear that it is more important than ever to build on that foundation of Christ, and not on the testimonies of others. We must build it, seek it and reach for it every day. And then we must REMEMBER what we have learned and felt. We need to revisit it often and remind ourselves what we know to be true.

Ronald A. Rasband counseled, “When I have counseled individuals … I have explored their decisions made over the years which led them to forget sacred experiences, to weaken, and to doubt. I encouraged them, as I encourage you now, to recall, especially in times of crisis, when you felt the Spirit and your testimony was strong; remember the spiritual foundations you have built.” (“Lest Thou Forget,” General Conference, October 2016)

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: As you meditate today, try to remember those testimony building experiences. Try to recreate them in your mind. Use your senses – what did you see, feel, hear, smell? Then take some time to write down what you remember so that you can refer to it later.

Call to Action: I am doing a 3 day meditation challenge – 2 times a day, for 3 days, at least 10 minutes long with a focus on Christ and the foundation of my testimony. I would love for you to join me and share your experiences.

“Therefore, whoso heareth these sayings of mine and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, who built his house upon a rock—and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not, for it was founded upon a rock. And everone that heareth these sayings of mine and doeth them not shall be likened unto a foolish man, who built his house upon the sand—and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell, and great was the fall of it.” (3 Nephi 14:24-27

“Brothers and sisters, none of us would knowingly construct our homes, places of work, or sacred houses of worship on sand or rubble or without appropriate plans and materials. Let us accept the Savior’s invitation to come unto Him. Let us build our lives upon a safe and sure foundations.” (Dean M. Davies, “A Sure Foundation,” General Conference, April 2013)

My mind is feeling unsettled tonight. I am turning towards a writing meditation to help me organize my thoughts and feelings on an issue and the “Wise Man and The Foolish Man” keeps running through my mind.

I have spent a lot of time studying faith in recent months. I know how vital it is to put my faith and trust in the sure foundation that is Christ and not in man. Today I came to the realization that, while I know that to be the case, I may be putting too much of my faith in other people.

As I grapple with my doubts and with difficult questions, I come to answers I feel comfortable with and that make sense to me and resonate in my heart. Then, when I hear other people whose I trust come to similar conclusions I find great comfort in that. Lately, however, like minded friends of mine whose faith I have relied on when mine has wavered, have been leaving the church in droves. I learned recently of yet another person who has made the decision that the church no longer fits into their life and I found myself shaken more than I ever expected. I start to fear that my searching will lead me on a similar or inevitable path if people whose beliefs aligned so much with my own or whose faith I admired can come to that conclusion. And I desperately do not want to lose my faith or my testimony of the gospel.

The answer that comes to my mind and speaks peace to my heart tonight is that I must not build my faith on the faith of others. I need to trust that still small voice that speaks peace to my heart and tells me that the doctrine of love that I believe in deep in my soul IS the truth. That the difficult questions have answers that come with love and peace. That the things that bring doubt and the truths I know can co-exist. That Christ is the way, this church is His and it will lead me to Him. I must be the wise man, and watch out for the foolish man within me that seeks validation and confirmation from other humans who are just trying to fumble their way this life like I am. I must continually seek that confirmation from God and live my life in a way that I can hear when he speaks to me. I am making a renewed commitment to study and ponder and meditate every day so that I can maintain that connection with him. I do not want my house to wash away when the floods come up, because up they are coming!

Meditation and Journaling Prompt: Where is your faith today? Where is your house built?

Call to Action: Commit with me to meditate twice a day for the rest of this week. Then please comment here, or on Instagram (or send me a DM if you don’t want to share publicly) and let me know how it went for you.